Self-esteem can boost sexual well-being—and vice versa

A long-term study by the Universities of Zurich and Utrecht has confirmed a dynamic correlation between self-esteem and sexual satisfaction. The results provide valuable insights about longstanding questions about whether better sex makes you feel better, feeling better makes you have better sex, or both.

Various theories suggest that people with higher self-esteem tend to have more satisfying sexual relationships and that the two factors influence each other. However, little research has been done to date on how this interaction develops over time.

A new study based on a nationally representative sample of more than 11,000 German adults provides some interesting insights. The study, now published in the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, was conducted by researchers from the Universities of Zurich (UZH) and Utrecht who analyzed 12-year data of people’s self-esteem and sexual experiences.

Long-term study shows a reciprocal effect

“People with higher self-esteem tend not only to be sexually active more often, but also to be more satisfied with their sexual experiences,” explain lead authors Elisa Weber and Wiebke Bleidorn from the Department of Psychology at UZH.

There were also significant correlations over time: changes in sexual satisfaction led to changes in a person’s self-esteem, and vice versa. These intra-individual associations show that self-esteem and sexual satisfaction can influence each other.

Findings on the dynamic interaction between self-esteem and sexual well-being are supported by theories that view self-esteem as a kind of social barometer that indicates the extent to which we feel accepted and valued in our relationships with other people.

Positive experiences in social and intimate relationships can increase self-esteem, while negative experiences are interpreted as a kind of warning signal for social rejection and are reflected in lower self-esteem in the long term.

At the same time, people with high self-esteem may be better able to communicate their desires and preferences to intimate partners, resulting in greater sexual well-being in the long term.

Age and gender matter

However, the study also showed that the correlations are not equally pronounced for all people. Age and gender matter: older people and women tended to show a stronger connection between self-esteem and sexual well-being than younger people and men.

Interestingly, relationship status did not appear to be relevant, as the link between self-esteem and sexual well-being was as strong for single people as it was for people in relationships.

Bleidorn says, “Answering these questions is of immense importance. Our results suggest that self-esteem plays an important role in our sexual experience, particularly with regard to sexual well-being. At the same time, changes in sexual well-being can also lead to changes in self-esteem.

“The results of this study help to understand the complex interplay between self-esteem and sexual experience and provide important impetus for future research in this area.”